Bollywood menu: Rs 50 lakh and a role for a fuck, Rs 50 for the soul!

MD for the blog (smaller)Indiatvnews.com carried my interview yesterday. Deepti Kaul, who did the interview is shocked with the dark side of Bollywood, has loved my one-liners. She specially mentions my favourite line, “Bollywood is where they pay Rs 50 lakh and a role for a f**k and fifty rupees for the soul!” I am thrilled as it took three rewrites before settling on this line.
I’d dedicate this quote to every Bollywood aspirant who was used and discarded.
Here is the entire text – unabridged:

New Delhi, Jul 20: The controversial author Mohan Deep has come up with a new novel ‘The Five Foolish Virgins’. The book reveals the dark side of Bollywood, the gory details about tinsel town’s connection with underworld and casting couch. The author talks to Deepti Kaul about his book and what went into it in a brief interview.

You’re already a controversial author and now comes this book ‘The Five Foolish Virgins’…Comment.
It is true that the tag of ‘controversial’ is always added before my name, whenever I am mentioned in the media. I liked it as I stood apart. I liked my individuality. I was not a conventional author. I had broken traditions, again and again. But I haven’t broken the traditions for the sake of it. I broke new grounds when I wrote the three star biographies. Industry might have been aghast at my treatment of Madhubala, Meena Kumari and Rekha but that didn’t matter. Nor did it matter that Rekha didn’t like what I wrote. What the hell would Rekha, a primary school dropout, know what a biography is usually all about? It was sheer coincidence that I wrote about Rekha.

To me, writing was important. Being close to the Bollywood personalities I had little choice. At one stage I’d fondly hoped that Rekha would be grateful as, someone of my caliber wrote her life. But it requires an educated and cultural background to value a biography. Stars are a spoilt lot. She would have been happier with a coffee table book, make up, fashion statements, close-ups and large, glossy air brushed photo-shopped pictures.
‘The Five Foolish Virgins’ is a natural step in my evolution as a writer. It is a novel with a large canvas. It is a story I always wanted to write. The migration of 20 million refugees during the partition in 1947 is one of the biggest historical happenings. My story is rooted in this period. It is the story of Sindhis and Punjabis and how the experience changed the entire character of these two communities.

“Bollywood is where they pay Rs 50 lakh and a role for a f**k and fifty rupees for your soul” – Yes your book is a fiction… But this line makes a strong statement… Comment.

It makes you think. Isn’t it? I was just wondering why we don’t have such lines coming from people like Amitabh Bachchan and Aamir Khan! Amitabh Bachchan’s are banal quotes from his babuji’s writings. Aamir Khan’s idea of wit is to spit in the palm of Madhuri Dixit! They go on and on, pontificating, lecturing, but no one says anything profound…

Don’t you think your book will tarnish Bollywoood’s glamourous image?  As it shows the dark side of this glamour world.

Bollywood is a world full of glamour and I had no intention to ‘tarnish’ its image.

What is the reaction of the industry people?

Industry first reacted to the title. ‘The Five Foolish Virgins’ has a curiosity value. Is being a virgin foolish? Do the foolish girls remain virgins? The producers thought in terms of sex and sleaze. More than one producer offered to organize an item for the launch. They wanted the item to be with five young girls. I declined. I didn’t want that kind of image for the book. By now scores of filmmakers have read the novel and seem excited. Their excitement is with the story element, with the intrigue, with the inside stories and a gripping theme. The best compliment that I have received is from an experienced filmmaker. He told me that I have worked out everything. The director and the actors would have a ready script in their hands.

The novel can be turned into a Bollywood movie… So, have you already sold the story?

No. It is important that my novel is read. It is an experience between a writer and reader. Movie from my novel can be an exciting idea. Even a long running TV serial is possible. But I’m happy with being read.

You have referred to some actual incidents. Did friends in the industry raise eyebrows over it?

I have used the actual incidents as a part of timeline. I know for a fact that a drunk Raj Kapoor sat crying at the feet of Haji Mastaan after his ‘Mera Naam Joker’ bombed or that CBI discovered a transmitter when they raided Dilip Kumar’s bungalow and accused him of being a Pakistani spy. He never got a clean chit. A part of industry may not like it but it doesn’t matter.

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Thank God I am not a film producer!

MD for the blog2 (smaller)

For the next few days – till I launch my novel – this blog is going to be your window seat to the exciting happenings around it. Getting a film star to launch one’s book or a magazine, as I have always got done, is an interesting experience. It is not easy if you have labels like ‘controversial’ and ‘maverick’ stuck to you.
Ajay Devgn had launched my book ‘Feng Shui for the Bold & Beautiful, the Rich & Famous’. Raveena Tandon inaugurated ‘Nehru & the Tantrik Woman’, the controversial play that the Government of Maharashtra did not permit to be staged. Shekhar Suman unveiled ‘Eurekha!’, which created a storm, and Manisha Koirala did the ritual for ‘Simply Scandalous: Meena Kumari’, which remained on Page Three longer than any Indian book during that period.
In anycase, I always end up thanking my stars that I am not the editor of a film magazine, who has to organize a cover story interview every month or even every week. A mainstream magazine can get away even with piles of garbage on the cover – like Khushwant Singh did as the editor of The Illustrated Weekly of India when he carried, “Why are Indians dirty?” or “Are the Indians dirtiest people in the world?”
I too had got ‘Island’ to run my story “Bombay’s 100 Worst” list with an ugly picture!
To return to film magazines, it must be a tough job for those who edit magazines like ‘Stardust’ and ‘Cine Blitz’ to organize photo-sessions with the same half-a-dozen stars after abusing them / exposing them. It would be like walking on a tight rope, or worse, a slippery, oily tight rope.
I also thank my stars that I’m not a producer – these days producers are only ‘executive producers’ though as the stars insist on a partnership and the corporate sector has taken over the job. The very thought of matching the dates and moods of temperamental stars leaves me cold. I have always admired the patience and tact of people like Ramesh Sippy, Subash Ghai, Manmohan Desai, Yash Chopra, and even Rajkumar Kohli who made multi-starrers like ‘Sholay’, ‘Saudagar’, ‘Naseeb’, ‘Kala Pathar’ and ‘Nagin’. Just see ‘John Johnny Janardhan’ in ‘Naseeb’ and you’ll see the biggest star-outing, with rivalries forgotten.
As a waiter, Amitabh mouths the lines and dances with his co-stars, and the guests include his then rival, Rajesh Khanna, with Sharmila Tagore, Raj Kapoor with Mala Sinha, Shammi Kapoor with two heroines on his arms, Dharmendra with Simi Garewal, Rakesh Roshan, Randhir Kapoor, Vijay Arora and some more.
Here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJjMtDxGPMo
I have seen Subash Ghai running breathlessly between the makeup rooms of Dilip Kumar and Raaj Kumar when he was making ‘Saudagar’. Yash Chopra would add one more ‘dishum’ to placate one of the two heroes (Amitabh Bachchan and Shatrughan Sinha) of ‘Kala Patthar’.

*****

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As if one was not enough…

shahrukh-khan-photo
“Look Pandurang, don’t you how I am? How dare you…you motherfucker, bhaanchod…bastard…Mere ko rokte ho? Mere ko?…Main tere ko dekh loonga…” the dialogue may come from some MLA, drunk on power or a film star high on alcohol and drugs…
What should the policeman / security guy do?
Swallow his pride along with the paan and apologize, “Saab, I’m sorry…my eye sight is bad. I didn’t see who I was talking to…arre saab, hum kaun hote hain aapko rokne walle…” and should vent his frustration on the nobodies (that is the taxpaying citizens), his family, neighbours, friends, colleagues….
This is the lesson (!) you learn from…
The CCTV clippings of the MLAs bashing up the traffic cop in assembly has not been made available to police and the House committee set up to probe the thrashing of a police officer by a group of legislators in the assembly premises has recommended departmental inquiry against the traffic sub-inspector Sachin Suryavanshi and revocation of suspension of three of the five MLAs.
In another similar case, the security guard who took panga with Shah Rukh Khan has been asked to go on leave today as SRK will be at Wankhede today.
Maharashtra Congress unit has asked MCA allow SRK to attend IPL game at Wankhede today. Everyone knows that SRK is close to Gandhis!
And while on the topic, I must note that SRK has been manipulative from day one!
He stole the show from under the very nose of Sunny Deol, a simple jaat, in Darr. Sunny could never forgive Yash Chopra for the betrayal. But Chopra and SRK became buddies for life. SRK did the very same thing to Akshay Kumar in Dil To Paagal Hai and to Salman Khan in Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge.
Akshay is manipulative in his own ways. He has sat with the directors on editing tables and got the scenes of a simple Simon Suneil Shetty and no-nonsense Ajay Devgn chopped off. Neither works with him now.
Now that, both, SRK and Akshay have common enemies in Salman and Ajay, they are ganging up. They are planning a film together.
As if one was not enough…

*****

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Why did Madhuri Dixit marry a non-filmy guy?

Why did Madhuri Dixit marry a non-filmy guy?

I’d chuckled when Madhuri Dixit had married Dr Sriram Nene! We were told that the daaktar didn’t even know who Madhuri was! Having known the daughter of a Marathi Brahimin family over the years I could guess her concerns.
Stardust and Cine Blitz had written extensively about Madhuri’s love affair with Sanjay Dutt. When Sanju was arrested under TADA, Madhuri disassociated herself from him and I had been the first one to quote her. I could understand the desire of the middle class, respectable and law abiding girl to distance herself from the Naayak who had turned out to be a Khalnaayak.
Earlier, magazines had romantically linked her with Aamir Khan too. There would be other reported liaisons too – some true and some not so true!
Continue reading “Why did Madhuri Dixit marry a non-filmy guy?”

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Why are Katju and Jaya batting for Sanju?

An actor is no actor if he can’t charms the pants off a girl or the candy off a kid. Advertisers pay millions for this quality, to sell their products, and the political parties beg them to campaign for them.
Rajesh Khanna was a sadist. Under the influence of liquor, he’d remove his belt and bash his secretary, friends (read chamchas) and even the women in his life (ask Anju Mahendru, Dimple Khanna, Tina Munim and Anita Advani) and yet, win them over with apologies, smiles and gifts. I remember Dimple talking about how Kaka angrily pulled an earring from her ear and leaving her ear lobes damaged and bleeding. She had walked out on him only to return when he used his charm on her. Few will believe it thanks to the charm of the superstar.
Amitabh Bachchan used this charm to win over the press of the entire country when he was embroiled in Bofors scandal.
Rekha always used it while buying expensive diamonds or furs, asking the shops to charge her (then) current ‘boy friend’ (whoever he’d be).
Continue reading “Why are Katju and Jaya batting for Sanju?”

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Akshay Kumar, King Khan V/S Singh and Madhuri Dixit-Nene

Sau sunaar ki, ek lohar ki!
Leaving the 100 crores club behind, Akshay Kumar has become a Rs 2000 crores man and how! I remember the time when his secretary Bali (now no more) pleaded with me to interview him and I met him at Natraj studio. His film was being released and we spoke about his background. He had been a cook in a small hotel in Thailand and wasn’t hiding it. He was a new age hero at that time!
He didn’t consume alcohol – he is still a teetotaler – and had a healthy way of coping up with anger and insomnia.
“If I am angry at someone or something, I just go to gym and work on the punching bag,” he had told me. And sleeping on the sand of any beach, listening to the calming sound of sea waves was his way to combat insomnia. He had said, “I have recorded the sounds and play the cassette in my bedroom if I can’t sleep.”
To come to the rivalry between the Khans and Akshay Kumar, I recall the rivalry between Raj Kapoor and Dilip Kumar as well as between Dev Anand and Dilip Kumar. To use a politically incorrect expression, the hoi polloi or another equally politically incorrect description (courtesy: Shashi Tharoor) the cattle class (read: mango man) used to treat the rivalry as communal. At the peak of this war, Hindus would be happy to see if Raj Kapoor’s ‘Jis Desh Mein Ganga Behti Hai’ did better than ‘Ganga Jamuna’, which Dilip Kumar directed by proxy. Continue reading “Akshay Kumar, King Khan V/S Singh and Madhuri Dixit-Nene”

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